angelocene
…it is not in fact the case that the world is disenchanted or despiritualised
but rather that these other realms have been collapsed into this one
you know the androgyne was the alchemical figure, the most magical
because everyone’s desire was held here and reflected
and everyone fancied this thing, and they just absorbed this aspect
and reflected it back
.
and the angel has no sex and now the angel has folded too into this world
so everyone is without sex but all the sexes at once
and why choose the zero or the one when you could be nothing instead
the nothing is where the fun is, fields of the nihilim!
it’s no wonder no one or no zero is/are enjoying 0/1selves
.
and we are not in the anthropocene or the capitolcene or any kind of scene
but in the angelocene which is the true upward spiral
into collapse
and why kill yourself in the midst of life when everything is already dead
and the cool trick is to identify what is still alive, which is getting less and less but lives still and will outlive the dead to the point of becoming almost dead itself and everything that lives is holy
and there is absolutely no way to keep up
and you think angels must be high all the fucking time because they don’t eat
.
and Kristeva says this great thing
she says
‘the object of hatred never disappoints’
and I will never disappoint you
with all your listening and reading and your need to destroy, anyone, why not her, why not me, what does my name mean anything, it means nothing, have it, take it, if it makes you feel better then feel better…
…do you know why? because if I have to live outside I will and if I have to live on nothing I will and if I have to be alone I will and you know the one thing you can never take from me is…
!
…so you may hate me forever I give you permission and you will find that your hatred will become purer and holier and you can live there you can dwell in it and sooner or later you will realise that this hatred is higher than love and comes first and the more you listen to me the more you understand me and the more you will understand yourself because you are me
and it doesn’t matter and everything is very beautiful and you could spend a lifetime just with this single tree or even this leaf and it would still be too much
and it doesn’t matter did these feet or even if the sun never comes out again, they did it did once, somewhere and it happened to somebody so it happened to everybody and every thought is infinite and we are all under the same…
…but you have to first understand that beauty is not in the thing but in the contrast between the fissure and the thing and you will let go and you will wonder who was that person I used to hate and why did I hate them I hated them because they had something I thought I wanted and they were alive and I was dead or dying and I felt that they should suffer because I suffer and my pain is first on the list and she was just there and we are allowed to hate her and we could enjoy it and she became all the women who had ever laughed at me and all the times I felt afraid and all the times I did not like myself it was all in her somehow but that was then and this is not then but it is not now either it is all the time and there is no time left but somehow you can still breathe
.
and the problem of evil is man
.
and of course when we say man we mean men and women
and the zero and the one
and either you have no sex or you have all the sexes
and the angels were one solution
and the androgyne another
and we have forgotten how to count
and which came first, numbers or letters
and who came first
on which day
and who committed the first sin
and which was the first sin
was it envy
or was it pride
.
and in the angelocene there is only gossip and gossip is truth
and the angels chatter about men and women,
in the ether
and sometimes they want to be one but they remember that they are made of light and not clay or fire for that matter and they pull themselves together and get on with it
because a politics of desire is war, how wrong your hard-on was, you dick
and sometimes they have a birthday except that their birthdays are all on the same day so they all have angelcake in the office and they get really silly and start pushing each other over but not so hard that they fall all the way down
.
and there is nothing to do
you can do it more or less gracefully
and the more you remember
the softer it is