Some of them were probably well-intentioned
At a dinner party once, someone suggested that small groups of men came together to agree to protect the vast majority of people from the horrors of the world, from the secret grinding wheels of desire, from the mendacity of man
by pledging an oath to each other you can get more done
every revolution exposes another part of desire
which never ends, it just gets sold back to you
it’s not a wheel, it’s a flaming wheel!
Goddamn that little bit of black fence on the righthand-side. I should have cropped it (2022)
In 1951, Eric Hoffer published a book called The True Believer. Lately people have been talking about it, looking for clues about what is happening, and you send me a message about it last night. Hoffer’s own life is in-itself very interesting - orphaned, nomadic, autodidactic…but perhaps this was all fictionalised, apart from the last. A man with no history attempting to describe those who desire to die for the future.
Hoffer writes about the fanatical, the truly zealous. I am not sure if the people today acting on behalf of or operating under the aegis of safety or in defence of minorities really mean it (but let us not also forget that billionaires and serial killers are also minorities, lol). People could give up their money, houses, jobs for those they really thought deserved it more than them. But, well, they do not, though they are certainly willing to sacrifice others, punish others. They seem more willing to kill than to die.
Maybe nobody dies online and this is part of it. Death is no longer real, there is only memory. Everything is a game. The Neo-Stasi have it easy, because, as we know, you can hang a man with a few lines, a malicious misreading. Hoffer has some nice lines, though. He was apparently a fan of Montaigne.
A man is likely to mind his own business when it is worth minding. When it is not, he takes his mind offhis own meaningless affairs by minding other people’s business. This minding of other people’s business expresses itself in gossip, snooping and meddling, and also in feverish interest in communal, national and racial affairs. In running away from ourselves we either fall on our neighbor’s shoulder or fly at his throat.
and
The burning conviction that we have a holy duty toward others is often a way of attaching our drowning selves to a passing raft. What looks like giving a hand is often a holding on for dear life. Take away our holy duties and you leave our lives puny and meaningless. There is no doubt that in exchanging a self-centered for a selfless life we gain enormously in self-esteem. The vanity of the selfless, even those who practice utmost humility, is boundless.
It is very hard to be human
It is hard to be a person
Everyday the same crushing fissures and thoughts; everyday the same choices, or similar enough. You flow-chart your way through decisions you’ve made a thousand times before. No not because x and y; But; logic gate; no; put an Ohm there; a resister there; the switch is on again; switch it off, go this way not that…this is not really even how logic gates work, do you even remember the little board?
The rational, utilitarian approach
how many hours does a woman need a week
how many weeks does a woman need
how many women does a week need?